Giving Up the Little Things

It’s like a plague (okay, a bit exaggerated, perhaps) that accompanies old age. A creeping, always justified excuse for slowing down and doing less. A self-congratulatory attitude that says: “I’ve paid my dues and now I’m owed some quiet time.” The self-assured argument that you no longer have to do all those meaningless tasks you were assigned early on in life and have been dutifully fulfilling ever since.

Now, you get to choose what you want to do, feel like doing, and damn it, are going to do or not do. And if you don’t want to do________ (fill in the blank here) then you don’t have to. You’ve earned your right to rest. At least, that’s the mindset that often comes creeping into that tired old brain of yours (or should I say, ours.)

The trouble with this self-fulfilling prophesy is that behind the aforementioned righteous rational lies a fatal flaw that can slowly but most assuredly rob you of the blessings of life. The truth is that it’s the little things that mean a lot, especially later on in life. To eliminate them is only to quicken the pace of an early demise or, at the very least, heighten needless anxiety about ‘the little things.’

I’ve seen it happen over and over again; with my parent’s, other friend’s parents and now (under the glow of my twilight years) some folks around me. It’s never seen as giving up. But rather, an embracing of doing less and not replacing that vacuum with something else worthwhile. Cutting back and emptying that repository of memories and not replacing it with anything new.

So, slowly but surely, the exercising slows down and finally stops. Travel becomes too clogged with uncertainty, driving at night is uncomfortable and our ‘own bed’ takes on a new importance. Our old familiar workplace has changed so much we don’t recognize it from when we first started in the business. Politics remains the same and we stop listening to the facts presented and only focus on the style of dress and how ‘believable’ our favorite candidate seems. If we still care at all.

All those morsels in our lives that made it a comfortable pattern of behavior are gradually lost or let go. Now we have more and more of less and less in our lives. The problem with this new scenario is that the vacuum never remains empty. Instead, it is filled with doubt and confusion and uncertainty of the new, ever evolving world all around us.

I can pin-point almost to the year when my friend’s parents stop living in the present. Their eldest was going off to college in the big city and they knew in their heart of hearts that their future was not going to be a repeat of their past.

It was going to be a different world (as seen through their children’s eyes) and they consciously or subconsciously decided to remain in ‘their’ own little world which is what they did. Gradually as the world changed around them, it became harder and harder for them to recognize the old from the new. Their world was becoming less and less like that of their kids. They found it harder and harder to relate to their children’s cares and concerns. The little, inconsequential things, took on new meaning and importance. Their kids urged them to ‘get out of the house’ and into the real world but they refused.

They’d become captives within their own self-made capsule of existence. Unfortunately, along with this isolation came confusion and concern about the myriads of changes all around them. Nothing seemed like it had been before. They felt lost and confused and thus clung to the old familiar at the expense of the new and present.

It’s a trap that’s easy to fall into without a conscious effort to stay informed, updated and involved with ‘skin in the game.’ Not an easy task but one that is critical to living a fulfilling life.

As mentioned so often before, at this stage of the game, ‘health is wealth.’ The secret sauce of staying alive and conscious to the world around us is to stay active in mind and body alike. The options and opportunities are endless and each one of them paves the way for a more satisfying and fulfilling life.

We only get one chance at this journey through life, why not live it to the fullest and take a break afterwards in eternity.