Self-Help

Believe it or not, there was actually a time when customer service counted for something and employees were trained to do their job well. My, how times have changed. I was commiserating awhile back with a fellow writer about how business’ have changed so much over the years.

Back in the eighties, my friend was a managing editor at Training Magazine in downtown Minneapolis and I was working fulltime in public television. I also had a side hustle with my own business of producing and distributing personal development video tape programs. This was long before many companies moved their call centers to India (now Vietnam) and you could expect long waits ‘on hold’ as a normal part of doing business with them.

Self-help and personal development topics were all the rage back then and a community of gurus was ready with the answers. Books, tapes, lectures, seminars, and ‘live’ courses all rushed in to fill the vacuum of need. Councilors included a Jesuit priest and a Mexican Shaman.

ChatGPT summarized it best: ‘In the 1980s, the self-help movement exploded in popularity, blending psychology, motivational speaking, business coaching, and spirituality. Many of these figures rose to prominence during that decade and became household names.

Tony Robbins – Emerged in the mid-to-late 1980s with Unlimited Power (1986) and his firewalking seminars; became one of the most recognizable motivational coaches.

Zig Ziglar – A dynamic speaker and author of See You at the Top (revived in the 1980s), famous for sales training and positive thinking.

Jim Rohn – Mentor to Tony Robbins, popular in the 1980s for his seminars on success, personal responsibility, and mindset.

Brian Tracy – Began gaining attention in the 1980s with talks and books about goal setting, productivity, and achievement (The Psychology of Achievement).

Wayne Dyer – Already known from the 1970s (Your Erroneous Zones), but remained hugely popular in the 1980s with his blend of psychology and spirituality.

On the business front, several authors wrote fascinating sagas about business success stories and innovative entrepreneurs. Thomas J. Peters is credited with co-authoring the 1982 best-selling book In Search of Excellence: Lessons from America's Best-Run Companies with Robert Waterman. The book sold over 5 million copies and helped change people’s attitudes about business in general. Two other authors, Jim Collins and Jerry Porras, wrote a series of best sellers like ‘Built to Last: Successful Habits of Visionary Companies’ as part of their ‘Good to Great’ Series of books.’

During that same time period, my own business, Sharden Productions, Inc., was heavy into producing and distributing personal development and self-help material in a variety of formats. I marketed my products to other public television stations, cable outlets, colleges, and universities and sub-contracted with distributors for a broader reach.

Two of my perennial top-selling courses were on speed reading and time management. But as the business grew, I expanded out to other markets like sports (Golf Memories), music (a jazz concert series called ‘Some Call It Jazz’) and even engineering courses. It was an eclectic series of products but it served various audiences and made money.

As those markets changed and evolved, I gradually shifted to producing more video series for my own home town. At one point, I had three series going simultaneously: ‘Hook and Ladder’ (Apple Valley Fire Department), ‘Police Beat’ (Apple Valley Police) and ‘Apple Valley Today’ (a magazine format video series on events and happenings in and around the city of Apple Valley). When those had run their course and I wasn’t ready for retirement, I switched to fulltime writing and never looked back.

Following that 80’s period of self-help literature, another more egregious form of salesmanship came on the scene in the early 90s. This was the whole ‘something for nothing’ or ‘little down and less in return’ sales pitch. Easy pickings in real estate were the main target for the naïve shopper but it also included just about any product or goal that required little effort on the buyer’s part, little knowledge of the product and easy sailing almost guaranteed.

The pinnacle of that foolishness was probably best exemplified by a Fortune Magazine front page shoutout in 2008. Just before the real estate crash of 2008, Fortune Magazine was touting the riches to be made in ‘get rich quick’ real estate schemes. Nothing really changes.

So, if it’s true that nothing really changes, I guess the only answer is that one remains vigilant, don’t believe it just because it’s in print or on social media and be ‘thrifty smart’ and not ‘stupid cheap.’

If it’s too good to be true, well, stupid, it probably is. I’ve seen a lot of people try to ride that pony and they usually fall off. We only have one road trip in this lifetime. So, learn to relax a little and enjoy the ride for what it is. The ride of a lifetime.

Going It Alone

Is group think a better way to create ideas, thoughts, images, patterns, songs and the written word?  Do artists create alone or by committee? Is Artificial Intelligence the answer? Does that special formula associated with creativity only call for isolated wanderings inside one’s head to find that image or thought. Then you pull, yank, cajole or force it out into the open in one of a bajillion forms or formats?

Is ‘creativity by consensus’ group think and/or ‘following the herd’ a real thing? I would argue it is not. I would suggest that creating in isolation, going inside one’s head, into the zone is the way most art is created. In my own songbook, the great musical collaborators were two artists work-ing together but still doing their own thing.

Several folks, whom I respect a lot, would strongly disagree. They argue that one must be open to ideas, suggestions, attitudes and ever popular trends if one is to succeed in telling their story. In the case of a script reading for a play, the creators of the work should be open to suggestions as long it is understood that the final say always rests with the playwright and director. Ultimately, it is up to the creator (whoever that may be) who gave birth to the project to have the last say.

The vast majority of creative works of art; be it novels, plays, movies, art, song, etc. have one creator, one visionary, one story-teller. A host of others may collaborate on the final product but its true birth mother or father is its true parent. That doesn’t ignore or denigrate the immense help that beta readers, editors, and other collaborators can add to the final product.

I read a fascinating book recently about the production of the Fleetwood Mac album ‘Rumours.’ The band consisted of four musically brilliant musicians, who together, melded their different approaches to rhythm and rhyme and cadence into each song and together created an award-winning album.

The magic here was in their individual ‘point of view’ approach to the music. For example, if you give ten directors a movie script, each will come up with a different movie in their mind. In the case of ‘Rumours,’ those four different points of view found a commonality or theme that the four musicians could agree upon. Each held to their own vision of the song but was willing to compromise for a fabulous final product.

It's simply another argument that in most cases there is one creator of a song, novel, play, movie. Certainly, collaboration is often a key here. But ultimately the core idea was (probably) the result of one person’s thought process, imagination, etc. AI can help or hinder here depending on how it is used or misused.

Bob Dylan is renowned for his original folk songs in the early 60s. The truth is that Dylan was a master at taking old 1700 and 1800 English, Scottish, and early Americana music and adapting it to his own particular style. The folk tradition is rife with examples of songs being adapted, changed, and revised for another artist.

Pablo Picasso is famously associated with the saying: “Good artists copy, great artists steal.”

The idea behind this line is that true creativity doesn’t come from simply imitating others, but from deeply absorbing influences, transforming them, and making them one’s own.

That said, there’s some nuance:

• Picasso is often credited with this quote, but there’s debate about whether he actually said it.
• Some scholars trace the phrase to earlier sources. For instance, the poet T.S. Eliot wrote in 1920:
  “Immature poets imitate; mature poets steal.”
• Picasso did, however, speak openly about borrowing, transforming, and reimagining other artists’ work. He once said:
  “When there’s anything to steal, I steal.”

So, while the exact wording may be questionable, the sentiment—that great artists take inspiration and transform it into something uniquely theirs—is strongly tied to Picasso’s philosophy and practice.  (Thanks to ChatGPT for that clarification.)

So, by that standard, Bob Dylan is a master thief and brilliant at it. I should be so talented.

Malcolm Gladwell in both his books ‘Outliers’ and ‘The Tipping Point’ touches on some of the seemingly serendipitous side notes that make such a difference in the creative process. It’s the little things like practice and dedication and focus that separate the actors from the ushers. And there’s a phrase for that: ‘Hiding the brush strokes.’

It always looks so easy because the media wants us to believe it is. House flippers flip and make a fortune overnight. Writers pen the great American novel without breaking a sweat. Movie directors create a one of-a-kind film just as planned and songwriters simply pen a classic on a whim. We want to believe that a playwright’s magic on Broadway was a simple journey from pen to stage.

Few of us truly understand the panic, fear, exhilaration, heartbreak, and hope that goes into creating a work of art. We don’t want to hear about the years spent toiling in the graveyard of broken dreams, spent efforts and abject failures before something, if anything, ever happens from all that soul-crushing effort. It’s all made to look so easy.  We seldom, if ever, hear about the many miles traveled before success is reached. Instead, every artist is presented as an overnight success.

Ignoring the harsh reality that in real life there are no guarantees and nothing is owed. Those with grit get it. Those lacking that ‘something within’ keep dreaming and hoping then wonder why nothing ever happens. Without real effort and sacrifice and usually some failure nothing is accomplished.

George Lucas went through hell to get his first feature ‘THX 1138’ produced. When it crashed as a commercial failure, he wrote another movie initially called ‘Friday Night in Modesto’ and finally produced it as ‘American Graffiti.’ Even that success didn’t guarantee any support for his next feature about space ships and large furry sidekicks.

My art is the written word. My mediums are primarily novels, plays and movies. Each presents its own unique set of challenges and opportunities for story-telling. Through good fortune and lucky breaks, I’ve had three plays produced by the Second Act Players in Rosemount. Two more were produced in California. Each was a wonderful learning experience and another opportunity to express myself.

I teach in my workshop on ‘How to Get Started as a Writer’ that the key to writing is to write. I make the point right up front that there are no guarantees and no promises. I can only point the way for my audience. I remind them that there are three things needed to become a writer.

Desire…but they won’t know if they have it unless they give it a try.

Perseverance…they won’t know if they have it unless they try.

Talent…they won’t know if they have it unless they give it a try.

The key here is to write something every day, almost every day or whenever they can. If they do that, they will begin to feel a passion that gets them out of bed each morning. They will have begun traveling on that long road to becoming a writer. That’s called showing your brush strokes.

As with any kind of art, nothing is guaranteed or comes easy. That’s life. But what a gift it is to create something, anything, that’s been swirling around in your brain for oh so long. Let’s face it, there is no better way to live your life than to do whatever it is you love to do.

Isn’t that what life is all about?

Riding The Rails

One of the joys of living in Southern California is driving the PCH. Mind you, traffic can be crazy, insane, and backed up going through every hamlet along the coast. And that’s on a quiet weekday. Don’t get me started about weekends or holidays? The PCH, Pacific Coast Highway or Highway One, winds its way from San Diego to the Northern end of the state. At times, it hugs the coastline so close you’d think your toes are going to get wet and other times loses the ocean view completely. It’s another taste of California, closeup but rarely personal.

Now riding the San Diego Coaster is another story. Rail travel has always been on my short list of imaginative ways to get about and the Coaster answers a need to see my surroundings without the stress of driving, parking, or those ‘idiots on the road.’

My first introduction to rail travel came from reading Woody Guthrie’s best-selling novel ‘Bound for Glory.’ It celebrated Woody’s hard living, rambling lifestyle as he hoboed around the country by rail during the Great Depression. It was high-octane fuel for the imagination of a ten-year old shouting out: “I wanna be like that too.”

The Coaster is an amalgamation of two separate rail lines; commuter and long-distance rail travel. Commuters range from suburban moms on a quick jaunt into town to a wide assortment of humanity in-between. Long distance travelers range from college students, sales folks, seniors on holiday and anyone else looking to escape for a day or longer. When I was there, it was to look, listen and sneak in a picture or two.

The Coaster’s normal run goes from Oceanside, just south of Camp Pendleton, down to San Diego. The ride from Oceanside to San Diego costs a little over six dollars round trip and takes about an hour. One glance at traffic on highway 5 morning or evening and its benefits can’t be denied. The East Coast is another soap opera entirely.

For several years, Sharon and I traveled with friends on the Amtrak commuter run from Washington, D.C. to New York city. It was a wonderful way to take in the Great White Way, the High Line, several plays, Greenwich Village, and other assorted tourist spots. All without the hassle of driving around Manhattan and spending our retirement on parking.

The Manhattan commuter run (actually we boarded in Annapolis) was about a four-hour trip. It was a fascinating reveal on the East Coast and its inhabitants. At each stop along the way, a wide variety of rail travelers poured into and exited out of the cars. Each stop was another ensemble of characters; some easily recognizable and others strictly Off-Broadway.

There was an interesting article in the New York Times a couple of years ago that spoke directly to the railfan in me. It was entitled: “Why the West Coast is suddenly beating the East Coast on Transportation.”

“It is an incredibly exciting time to be in urban transportation,” the New York transportation commissioner, Polly Trottenberg, told a breakfast gathering of powerful New Yorkers, pointing to California’s progress.”

The Los Angeles area, the ultimate car-centric region with its sprawling freeways, approved a sweeping $120 billion plan to build new train routes and upgrade its buses. Seattle has won accolades for its transit system, where 93 percent of riders report being happy with service – a feat that seems unimaginable in New York, where subway riders regularly simmer with rage on stalled trains.

“It’s a tale of two systems,” said Robert Puentes, the president of the Eno Center for Transportation, a nonpartisan research center in Washington. “These new ones are growing and haven’t started to experience the pains of rehabilitation.”

We’ve ridden the rails from San Diego to Santa Barbara a couple of times and hopped the Coaster for a day-trips when we’re in San Diego. Off hours and in between rush hour, it’s a leisurely way to watch the coast flow by and take in daily life in the numerous beach towns it glides through.

Los Angeles plans to build 100 new miles of rail – essentially doubling the Metro system, whose first rail line opened in 1990. There are now six lines and 93 stations. “I made sure we included funding for long-term maintenance,” said Dow Constantine, the executive of King County, which is home to Seattle, “so you don’t get the situation we’re seeing in New York and Washington where the systems have been neglected and it’s expensive and inconvenient to rebuild.” *

There’s even talk of a rail line extending from downtown Los Angeles to the Coachella Valley. Having spent some time on highway 10 going into L.A., I can only hope it will come sooner rather than later.

*Excerpts taken from the New York Times article “Why the West Coast is suddenly beating the East Coast on Transportation” by Ms. Camille Fink.

Appreciation

‘Liking what you already have’ goes much deeper than simply being satisfied with your particular stage in life. It’s more than just ‘taking time to smell the roses or a blanket appreciation. So, what exactly is it?  A book I recently read brought that question to mind. This particular book’s premise asked the question: ‘Does the city that you live in make you happy or sad?’

In his book ‘Happy City,’ Montgomery explains that: “What really makes a good place to live? Journeying around the world from Copenhagen to Bogota,’ Charles Montgomery shows that living in densely populated cities can actually make us healthier, saner and happier.” In the book, Montgomery has some fascinating examples centered in California that got my attention. More on that later.

It’s an intriguing question and one that goes far beyond trying to encapsulate one’s life in general. As another cliché goes: ‘It’s the little things that count.’ Let me explain:

My morning ritual is quite simple: Coffee, some kind of sweet and my Amazon tablet. I relish those mornings when it’s just me listening to the birds awakening to the first light of day. It’s my ‘quiet time’ when I peruse multiple news feeds, select web sites, and my Facebook newsfeed. It’s time to think about current and future writing projects, the day’s activities and (always) some-thing to be grateful for. In today’s hip jargon, it’s my little moment of mindfulness.

At another level, it’s gratitude in its purest form. The sun painting deep shade against a mountainside. Dew on the early morning grass. Time to enjoy the moment. The list of those free, always present gifts of life is all around us. We/I just have to take the time to recognize them.

Montgomery had several examples that caught my attention. He talked about a young couple, who after the 2008 real estate debacle, bought a foreclosed house in a new development outside of Stockton, California. They got the house at a great price but very quickly learned the real price to pay was in their long distance commute each day to work in the Bay Area. It didn’t take them long to realize that their hour and a half daily drive was a high price to pay for ‘living the good life.’

Beyond work and commuting, they had no real life. They didn’t know their neighbors. They were too tired to get involved in local community events and their life had become a daily grind. So much for the often-admired ‘California lifestyle.’ I’m guessing, that in my own backyard, there are a lot of folks traveling up 35 North or down 35 South to the Cities who are experiencing much the same commuting nightmare.

One of Montgomery’s research questions was to ask people: which would make you happier – living in California or the Midwest? He went on to explain: ‘If you chose California, you are like most people – including Midwesterners, who told surveyors they were sure that Californians were happier. Californians agreed. They were all wrong. Californians and Midwesterners report pretty much the same level of life satisfaction.

I could blame that perception on Frankie Avalon or Annette Funicello and their mid-Sixties surfing movies. The Beach Boys and Jan and Dean were part of that lot too. In truth, California is as much a mindset as anything else. But true happiness can be found in the most out-of-way places.

I’m not sure if I came to that realization one morning after a long mountain hike or in the dusk of another well-spent day. Collectively, it was all those little things around me that didn’t cost a dime and brought immense comfort and satisfaction. For example, it wasn’t the cars in my garage. A 1999 Buick LaSabre and 2009 Toyota wouldn’t fit alongside my neighbor’s stable of classics. It wasn’t any of the material things that brought satisfaction but could be discarded without a hint of regret.

Over and over again, it all comes down to those simple little things, all around us, that bring the most satisfaction of living one’s life. Best of all, it doesn’t cost a dime; except for the coffee and treat.